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Why we should never avoid suffering

Why we should never avoid suffering

Knowing that my beloved ones get hurt or rejected cause me immense pain. I would like to take it over. I would like to protect them against any injustice. I would like them to be happy all the time. Learning goes first. That is why […]

My best friend who never was my friend.

My best friend who never was my friend.

We believe we will be best friends forever. After some time, we claim our best friend changed. Is it a friend who changes or is it a friendship which changes? Today, I’m going to share with you a story about my best friend who didn’t […]

6 mistakes I have made when trying to follow my dreams.

6 mistakes I have made when trying to follow my dreams.

Mistakes are big time consumers, but they bring a great opportunity to learn. Today, I’m going to tell you about the mistakes I have made when trying to follow my dreams. Some of them I make regularly. But each time they teach me something new. […]

I wanted my mom to be everything for me.

I wanted my mom to be everything for me.

I’ve never known how did it feel to be the whole world for someone. I never felt I was. There was always something more important. There was always something else to do. There was always something which couldn’t wait. For the first time in my […]

How did I manage to overcome my past in 8 simple steps

How did I manage to overcome my past in 8 simple steps

One is for sure. We cannot forget our past. But we can accept it. We can live with it. And we can stop thinking about it every day. One bad chapter doesn’t mean it’s the end of the story. The only thing is that sometimes […]

What if I want to give up?

What if I want to give up?

Wherever I turn, I hear “don’t give up”. Whoever I talk to, I’m told “don’t give up”. Whatever page I open, I read “don’t give up”. What if I simply want to give up? I’m blogging for over 15 years. I’ve started as a teenager […]

Small is better than big.

Small is better than big.

Life is not about big things we do. We don’t do big things. We do small things which can be transformed either into big achievements or big failures.

Your best friends know you the littlest.

Your best friends know you the littlest.

How does it happen people, who spend much time with us, don’t know who we are? What we like. What is important for us. People see differently. Recently, I had my birthday party. I’ve got plenty of gifts which were totally different than I would […]

Prison is not a place. It’s a state of mind.

Prison is not a place. It’s a state of mind.

Can we be free in a prison? Yes, we can. Prison doesn’t have to be the jail. Prison might be the place we live in. The people we live with. Things we can do nothing about. Today, I felt I can be free regardless of […]

People know better how we should live.

People know better how we should live.

Most of the people tend to tell us what should we do. How we should live. Who we should listen to. As if there was one best way to approach life. As if there was one best receipt to make our life happy. As if […]


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How did I manage to overcome my past in 8 simple steps

How did I manage to overcome my past in 8 simple steps

One is for sure. We cannot forget our past. But we can accept it. We can live with it. And we can stop thinking about it every day.

One bad chapter doesn’t mean it’s the end of the story.

The only thing is that sometimes it takes weeks, sometimes it takes months and sometimes it takes years.

Can’t it last a bit shorter? It can! Here is what we can do to speed things out a bit.

1. I forgive myself

Sometimes things don’t go the way we would like them to do so. Sometimes we want to do something right but it turns into something wrong. Sometimes life wants us to take a lesson.

Blaming yourself for what you did wrong is like blaming yourself that you live. Every mistake teaches us a lesson we would never get if it hadn’t happened. This lesson may change all we didn’t dare to change before. This lesson may be a new start in our life. This lesson may help us to make our way to the right direction.

We may not be forgiven but we can forgive ourselves.

This is a great step to feel relieved and regain inner peace. Thanks to that we can feel better. We can do better. We can be better.

How to forgive yourself?

What always works for me is powerful affirmations:

I forgive myself

I let the past go with peace

I accept my mistakes

I wish all the best to people I hurt / who hurt me

I deserve to start over

Everything happens for a purpose

Whenever a wave of guilt hits me or I feel like a witness I use one or more of above affirmations. It releases the tension. With the course of time, the memories become less and less painful. I focus on a new path of my life.

2. I focus on now

Living in the past is useless as we have no power to change what is already behind us. The only power we have in our hands is living now.

How to focus on now?

    • It may seem silly but I’m used to pricking my finger with a nail to bring my thoughts back to the present. It’s a sign for me I flow too much behind now.
    • I play my favorite music loud to jam unnecessary thoughts
    • I try to catch the moment when something good is happening
    • I try to do one thing at once
    • I try to think about one thing at once.

3. I get busy

The past wins over me when I have nothing to do. When I have too much time to think. That’s why I do my best to get busy. To concentrate my energy and attention on something more constructive than reviewing the past.

It’s a good time to start something new: working on a new project, a new experience, a new skill. Nothing inspires so much to forget about the past than a new challenge.

4. I meet new people

Fresh blood, fresh mindset, fresh ideas. New people mean a new life. New people mean you can start to be someone new. You can start to be yourself.

New people in my life give me a hope my life may be different. New people don’t judge me the way my past does. New people see my values, not my mistakes. Their perspective is not shadowed by my past actions.

I can start over.

5. I breathe consciously

Whenever I feel like a bad memory strikes on me I take 5 conscious breaths. I let it go through me and pass away. I don’t hold it. I don’t analyze it. The more I resist accepting certain things the more it gets back to me. I let it become part of me for a while to heal it.

It’s like a cloud blew by the wind. It comes and goes. It gives rain or gives thunderstorm. But eventually, it gives the sun the place to shine.

6. I move on

Few weeks ago I bought a pair of jogging shoes. They’ve been waiting for their time. One day, I was totally pissed off with the whole world. I put them on. I went out. I took my dog with me. I started to run.

Suddenly I felt something strange. I felt all my stress was gone. All my tension disappeared. All my anger flew away. I felt free. I could breathe again.

That evening I fell asleep with peace.

7. I meditate

When I feel overloaded with bad memories, I just close my eyes and pay attention to the way I breathe. Sometimes 30 sec is enough to get back control over my mind.

8. I pray

When I feel down and helpless then I speak to Him. Knowing there is someone above all of this shit gives hope. Obviously, it’s easier to pray when everything goes wrong than when everything goes well. But when I need to fight with bad memories there is no one better to help in case all my cannon fell apart.

What are your ideas to let the past go?

I would be happy to hear from you!

Mimi.

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